I'm Attracted to Walls

So here's the thing.

Once upon a time, when I was little, I was chasing my brother around the house.
Do I remember why? No. But I'm guessing it has something to do with him being a jerk and stealing my blankie or something. Or maybe he played a prank on me and I got mad.

Anyway.
Chasing my brother around the house.

He goes for the bathroom, closing the door behind him.

WHAM! I run into the wall.

NOTE: I do not run into the bathroom door. I run into the wall. This indicates that if Caley had not closed the door, I still would have run into the wall.

That is how I lost my two front teeth. Technically, the wall just loosened them up for me. But I like to exagerrate.

Here's where I am going with this story:

Yesterday, I tossed Rudyard on the bed. This is a normal thing. He likes to be tossed on the bed. It gets him excited, and he starts war-dancing about until we either engage in a chase, or he falls off the bed because he is uncoordinated and doesn't ever look where he is going.

So I toss Rudyard on the bed, and then I dive in after him.

I still haven't learned my lesson, you see. I can't seem to gauge the distance between my body and the wall.

BAM! My head hits the wall and the worst headache on earth submerges. I am probably bruised. The headache lasted for a long time, during which I was clutching my brains and going, "ARRRHHHGGGG" the entire time.

Rudyard thought it was funny.

He was also my only witness to my stupidity.