Ventilation

RARARAGAGALSJKTNL;ASDFJHSDK;HALSIEHTRN!!!!!

I just want my car to work properly. Is that too much to ask???

To All Sleepy Ferrets:

Sleep no more! Momobella is here to wake you from your dreams! It doesn't matter if you are tired, you will be woken up. Momobella commands it, and so it shall be done!

If you will not wake when initiated, this is what will occur to you in SEQUENTIAL order:

• Delicate Nudging
• Delicate Kissing
• Delicate Nosing
• Vicious Chomping

Do not doubt my ways, for they are the True and Righteous ways! They are Momobella's Ways and to not pay attention upon first Nudging, such consequences will inevitably follow!

If you are incapable of paying immediate attention to the Beautimous Face of Momobella, the following will occur until you are properly giving The Momo what she Rightfully deserves:

• Extreme Harrassment

Harassment may include but is not limited to:

• Not Getting Out of Your Face
• Not Letting you Walk Past Without Noticing Me
• Not Allowing you to Poop Properly
• Not Giving you a Chance to be the Grown Ferret you are and Allow you to Walk Down the Stairs by Yourself

Hopefully you understand all of this.

If you do not, please come to Momobella (WHICH IS I) for clarification.

If you are not sure who Momobella is, Momobella is the one tearing up the newspaper for not having her way. She is a brilliant strategist and gets along well with others.

 

Much Love, Momobella

Tired Of

the weight is immense
there is no metaphor; it is literally immense
i can barely hold myself up anymore
i wish it would just go away and leave

no amount of tea-drinking will help
tea just makes me want to pee
and while that may make my bladder feel lighter
this weight
is just
too immense

seriously
this sagging
the sagging i feel under my eyelids
its like
one-hundred pounds
probably

and my shoulders
they want to roll forward
and not let my body straighten up

and my throat
wow
just wow
i didn't know throats could be weighty
but jesus christ
really
jesus christ

do you ever get the feeling
that maybe screaming
loud
loud
loud
would help any?

just a scream
just letting it out
would that help?

well hush
because we're in a library
and i'm so so so tired

Miracles

Miracles DO happen! Momo and I cuddled for 10 FUCKING SECONDS today. I never thought it would happen. I'm getting all teary-eyed.

Chuchundra

 I have come to realize I have yet done a proper introduction of the new family addition, Chuchundra.

Chuchundra is Sam's new Guinea Pig. She is cute as a button. This is her third home and her last home.

We acquired her because a coworker of mine told me that her daughter-in-law was unbearably allergic to guinea pigs.

 In the past, whenever Sam and I have to make a stop at the pet store, Sam has always enjoyed playing with the pigs.

Even though we had just acquired six rat babies, I still asked Sam if he was interested. And of course he was.

Then Penny-Pig, now Chuchundra.
She is named after the muskrat in Rikki Tikki Tavi, who was too afraid to go in the middle of the room and just stayed next to the walls.

 In the Chuck Jones cartoon, they drew the muskrat like a guinea pig. So there is part of the inspiration. The other part is that when Chuchundra first came to us, she didn't know how to deal with the new and unfamiliar smells. So she hid. And when she couldn't hide, she stood in her spot, petrified.

It was cute.

Chuchundra has adjusted very well. She has learned that I am a sap, and all she has to do is ask and I will give her a carrot

(I swear, all the critters in this house have me under their thumb).

She is comfortable enough with her new surroundings that she enjoys padding about the room. Out living room is covered in hay, and Sam just said yesterday that it was like she was grazing our carpet. Which I guess she is.

As with any animal that we acquire, we've been learning about pigs. For example, guinea pigs are like tiny little sheep. They like to graze, they enjoy moving in herds, and they have different ways to communicate with each-other is something is up.

We've learned that Guinea pigs have about twelve different noises/calls they make. I haven't heard all of them. I've heard "Give me a treat," "Get out of my face," "I'm quite content," "Don't touch me there!" and I've heard her talk to herself as she walks about.

So, there we have it. Official introduction.
Geez, I'm bad at intros. It happens with people too. I always forget to introduce people to other people, and then we all stand there twiddling our thumbs.

Driving and Crazy Folk

This happened earlier this week and I'm just now getting around to it.

Audrey and I were in the car, driving down Alps Rd and hitting the Alps Rd/Baxter Street intersection. I was given the left arrow to turn onto Baxter and so I did. Then, out of nowhere, a car attempts to make a U-turn in that intersection.  Now, anyone who has ever seen this intersection knows for a fact it is most certainly not a place appropriate for U-turns. I don't know what this person was thinking, but she was blocking my way onto Baxter Street. I was stuck in the middle of the intersection until she was able to make all the necessary adjustments to properly turn around and go down Baxter herself.

One of my personal pet-peeves whilst driving is getting stuck in the middle of an intersection. I try to avoid it as much as possible. It make me feel vulnerable and open for smashing. Anyone with half a brain, if they saw a car stranded in the middle of an intersection, would most likely stop and wait until that car leaves. However, human society has proven to me time and again that most individuals so not even have one quarter of their brain present in their skulls.

So I have to wait a goodly while until this individual in this car that is PERPENDICULAR to me has somehow managed to back up, turn her wheels slightly, back up more, turn her wheels slightly more, etc. and has gotten onto Baxter without accident.

Once that has occurred, I get out of the intersection and head onto Baxter, towards the beloved ACC Library.

Immediately, this woman (for Audrey and I discovered eventually it was an elderly woman driving with her elderly husband in the seat next to her) begins cruising down Baxter St. at 10 mph. I understand that it is not a road to go fast on, but the speed limit here is 35 mph, and 25 mph when the school is let out.

At first, I think that perhaps the individual has car trouble. I keep some distance but continue going down the road at the snail's pace, occasionally stopping in the middle of the road because the car in front of us has done so.

Audrey and I both soon discovered that this woman did not have car trouble in the slightest. She was just very simply an incompetent driver. I understood this eventually when she merged into a bus lane.

When this individual went into the bus lane, I of course picked up speed. It was at this point I still assumed she was still having some car trouble and that the bus lane was providing her a safe spot to remove the car from the road temporarily.

Of course my assumption was incorrect.

What happened was this:

• Woman discovered the bus lane was not a turning lane into the library;
• Woman decided to merge into moving traffic without looking;
• Woman almost T-bones my car;
• Woman honks at me for not looking;
• I scream "Fuck you!!" while all my windows are down and while my sister is sitting in the passenger seat.

I think the only reason I didn't flick her off as well was because I think of myself as a responsible driver and wanted to keep both hands on the wheel. Also, since my right tail-light is out (due to a tree smash), I need an spare hands and arms for signaling my turns.  Which also reminds me, the majority of people in town don't seem to understand left-and-right hand signals. This is also quite irksome to me.

I realize I have a lot of pet-peeves when it comes to driving, and I think they are all good pet-peeves to have. So I won't be getting rid of them. Maybe I'll formulate a list one day and post it, for my own personal pleasure. Also, if you read it, you would know that when I am in your car I am certainly judging your driving capabilities.

Happy Madness

Saturday night was our awesome belly dance show.
It went really well, even though I messed up on my lefts-and-rights during our maya sequence (I was thinking "Go right! Go RIGHT!" but then I went left...).

And in the second number I failed my ensemble partner by not dropping the veil early with her.  We were peeking out of veils in one bit, and she dropped hers a few counts early. Instead of dropping with her like I SHOULD have done, I held onto it. I did finally drop it after 8 counts of music, so hopefully it all looked intentional and nobody noticed anything.

Earlier that day we worked out and learned Bollywood Bellydance fusion as well as Hip-Hop Bellydance fusion. My thighs were near dead, so I slept mostly well that night.





 Audrey had slept over and the next morning we snuggled up with Chuchundra for a bit before embarking on an adventure to surprise our dad with a belated birthday cake.


But the day was long and hot, and by the time we got to Dad's house with the gluten-free cake mix, we were too tired and icky to do anything, so instead we just hung out with my dad and his friend, Naomi (who is cute as a button and told me about this awesome website).

Then we gave Chelsea a bath, which she needed very much because her butt was dirty. We gave her a good brush down then went on a walk so she could dry.

It was then that I learned she will stop where she is walking and poop anywhere, including the middle of the road.

After that I finally went home to rest. Sam just finished playing Dragon Age and we stayed up well past the midnight hours to begin the beginning of Dragon Age II (which I will already say is WAAAAAAAY too different from the first one and its weird).

I'm still not done with my game of Dragon Age, but I like watching Sam play out the story of the second one...... errrrgh! Conflict!!

Witness!

So I'm working on a belly dance clock for our raffle that's gonna be taking place during our April 9th show and all of a sudden a hear an alarming noise coming from the ferret cage. I can't tell if it's a mix between a sneeze or a bad dream, so my maternal instincts make me drop everything I'm doing (I'm cutting numbers out for the clock.... very meticulous) and rush over to the ferret cage.

I still don't know if it was a sneeze or a bad dream, but I do know that Momobella was wide awake and was looking at me. So I said,

"Momobella, do you want to come out and play?"

And of course she does. That's why she's waiting on me to open the door. I notice the boys are still sleeping and I decide not to wake them up. Momo comes out and romps about for a bit while I work on my clock numbers.

Every few minutes I stop working and check on Momo, to see how she is doing. I do this with all the critters for fear they will get into trouble (because they typically do).

Everything is normal the first few times. I catch Momobella tearing up the toilet paper, the next time I see her making a mess with some bags near the guinea pig's dwelling--which sends Chuchundra in a singing tizzy because she thinks she's getting some sort of treat--and I also catch Momobella trying to knock everything off any table she can ever find a way to climb.

When I'm finished with my numbers I pop them in the oven to bake and happen to see Momo just descending from the upper level in the ferret house. I go over to her and I say,

"What are you up to Momo?"

I look at the boys. They are still sleeping.

Momo jumps out of the lower portion of the cage, pauses, and then jumps back in. She thinks about going up the steps, then pauses again, and decides she'd rather take a poop. When she's finished pooping, she goes back to the upper level and noses the boys.

 (Jack and Momo being cute in the picture in the above picture)

Instantly, I see. She wants to play with them!

Well, she doesn't look to me for help, so I let her be. Stormy had said when Momobella wanted to play with her former cagemate, she would drag the other furrt around whether he enjoyed it or not. I wanted to see if she would attempt something like this.

After she noses for a bit, she goes back down the stairs.

And then after an indecisive moment, she goes right back up. And she nudges and noses them harder. She sees Rudyard starting to wake up, so she pushes him around.

She's saying, "I want to play! I want to play!"

And Rudyard is stretching a yawning and getting up. Jack is rolling over and taking his time, which Momo lets him (I don't think she could move him even she tried).

The next thing I know, Momo is accompanying Rudyard down the steps, not even letting him stop for a poop, and getting him out of the cage and into the room. Jack decides to take his sleepy time in my arms, but I eventually put him down on the floor with Momo and Rudyard. Again, he's slow to start, but this time Momo is sniffing in his face and pushing him about with her nose.

"Alright, alright," says Jack. "I'm up."

And he gets up, and the three of them run off and start playing.








(Jack in the picture to the right)